no tea after 12

Here is my first resolution for 2010…never make another New Year’s Resolution ever. Never, ever, ever, again. And here’s why…

It’s pretty much fact that most people make New Year Resolutions to fix things that they don’t like about themselves. Eaten too much at Cristmukah? Oh just lose it in the New Year! Drunk yourself into a stooper every day and night of 2009? Well January is the time to sober up! Chain smoke your whole life? 2010 is THE YEAR to quit. Sound familiar? I could go on, and on, and on, and on, and on.

It is also fact that most resolutions are dead in the water by March, if not earlier.

So by my calculations, if you are trying to change something you don’t like and fail within a measly 8-12 weeks aren’t you going to feel even worse about whatever it is you wanted to change in the first place and de facto feel worse about yourself?

AWESOME way to start the year.

I don’t know about you but its god damn hard for me to change. I am the quintessential old dog. I am not just stuck in my ways, I’m practically cemented with a human-sized vat of extra hold super glue. But the nagging little Darwinist voice in my head keeps saying…Evolve! Move on! Get some new skills! Or be left behind… And my ridiculously competitive perfectionist ‘must be the best at everything’ voice says ‘Do it NOW or you could be a Loser who is LEFT BEHIND, or worse, this might cause you to DIE’. But let’s not go there that’s a whole other set of neurosis.   

So making changes might be hard for me, but here’s my method, tried and true:

1. Make a decision to make a change. Whatever it might be, there’s no good in just knowing you ought to do something. You are far better off knowing you will do it. Even if it takes a very long time.
2. Start learning. Research everything and anything you can about what it is you want to change and how other people are doing it. I think one of the biggest problems people have when making a change is attempting only one way of getting the job done. For me, it is usually several solutions and often more than one attempt that gets me to the result I’m after.
3. Commit fully, but break it down into very small steps. One of my favorite authors SARK has a method called 'Micromovements', and its a really great method to get moving and keep moving towards a seemingly monumental task. Just break whatever it is down into teeny tiny steps and move at your own pace. Need to write a 10,000 word term paper? You have to turn on your computer first. 
4. Adjust along the way. We all know L.I.F.E. happens. So rather than let it fuck up your big plans, make a few adjustments and keep going. It really is that simple.
5. See it through. I am a Completer / Finisher / Virgo ('nuf said) so an unfinished project will linger in my mind, forever. If you are lucky enough to just let things go then good for you! But you will thank yourself if you do whatever it is you set out to, even if your result only lasts one minute the self satisfaction will last at least five.
6. Be kind, Rewind. If you do fuck it up somewhere along the line, be nice to yourself. And Repeat Step 1.

So this year I will resolve to never resolve again and I think you should go ahead and use this method as your own. At the very least, bookmark this page so you can return to it in March.